The main idea of my predictions for this season is this: that five of the so-called Super Seven teams would miss the playoffs. How does that prediction look six weeks in to the season?
It looks ok. Who looks worse? Me, who picked five of the “Super Seven” to miss the playoffs? Or everyone else, who picked all seven to make the playoffs? Groupthink is whack.
The “Super Seven” are the Yankees, Dodgers, Nationals, Indians, Astros, Redsox and Cubs. I picked the first five to miss the playoffs.
The Yankees look Super. Super Awesome. The first few weeks of the season, not so much. But since, they have won 15 out of 16 games. Still, there’s a lot of baseball still to be played. And with Aaron Boone and his perpetual deer-in-the-headlights “I don’t belong managing a MLB team” look leading the way, with chemistry problems everywhere you look, and with a lying sociopath named Alex Rodriguez in the front office, the Yankees are ripe for collapse. They will collapse. They will miss the playoffs this year.
The Dodgers look Super Awful. Entering play on Tuesday night they are 15-19. LOL! Everyone said they were Super Awesome! Everyone who said that looks awful! Maybe Andrew Friedman shouldn’t have traded AJ Ellis! What a fool! What a scrawny, snobby, miserable, wretched fool!
The Nationals have been playing well. They’ve won 8 out of 9 games. Wow. I’m so impressed. NOT! They’re just two games over .500! And everyone picked them to win the NL East. Well, everyone except for me that is! Maybe Mike Rizzo shouldn’t have fired Dusty Baker. Why did he do that?
The Indians look awful. Everyone said “They’re so so Super Awesome! Like the Nationals and the Dodgers!” Wow. They’re 17-17 entering play on Tuesday night! Does a .500 baseball team qualify as a Super Team? At least Cleveland sports fans have Lebron, for now at least.
The Astros look ok. They beat the Athletics by 14 runs last night. Ok. Before that, they looked awful. They had lost 5 out of 6 games and could barely score a run! They have played well at times this year, but, they lost two out of three to The Big Kahuna aka Mike Scioscia’s Anaheim Angels a few weeks back. And they trail The Big Kahuna in the standings entering play on Tuesday night! LOL! Everyone picked the Astros. I picked the Angels. LOL! The Astros will miss the playoffs, as I predicted.
All five of those teams will miss the playoffs, as I predicted.
How about the teams I did pick to make the playoffs?
Well, the Red Sox were in first place entering play on Tuesday night. I picked them to win the AL East when most people picked the Yankees. They were all going goo-goo-ga-ga over Stanton and home runs. They were just looking at the numbers. LOL. It’s illegal for the feeble to see beyond that. I was looking at Dave Dombrowski and I was like “that is a Legit Dude. Brian Cashman is a snobby intellectual.” That’s why the Redsox will win the AL East, as I predicted.
Joe Maddon was up all night listening to classic rock music again the other night. Then he decided to make a drastic lineup change, even though the Cubs had won 9 out of 12 games including 5 in a row. He moved Anthony Rizzo to leadoff! The Cubs proceeded to lose 5 games in a row! They thumped the Marlins last night, though, and sit just two games out of first at this time. They will win the NL Central, as I predicted.
Everyone picked the Nationals to win the NL East. I picked the Mets. The Braves are in first right now, but they are Not Legit. Neither are the Phillies who are 0.5 games out of first right now. Kapler and Klentak are whack. This is Basic Math. The Mets have all sorts of good vibes, karma, mojo, and General Awesomeness which counts for at least as much as batting average, OPS, DRS and FIP if not more. Way more. They will win the NL East, as I predicted.
Everyone picked the Astros to win the AL West. As I said above, I picked The Big Kahuna aka Mike Scioscia’s team, the Anaheim Angels to win the AL West. They are in first place right now! Plus, have you seen Shohei Otani! He’s so awesome! And his translator’s Hair is Awesome! And Mike Trout is Awesome too! So is Albert Pujols despite what the wretched, miserable, conformists in the SABRmetrics community say! That’s why the Angels will win the AL West, as I predicted.
Everyone said “The San Francisco Giants are too old, fat and slow to make the playoffs.” LOL! What they missed is that Brian Sabean is a Legit Dude, Bruce Bochy is a Legit Dude, Andrew McCutchen is a Legit Dude, Evan Longoria is a Legit Dude, Buster Posey is a Legit Dude, Madison Bumgarner – he hasn’t even thrown a pitch and the Giants are 19-16 as of this writing! Wow! – is a Legit Dude, Johnny Cueto is a Legit Dude with Legit Hair and Kevin Durant is a Legit Dude and he’s around so that’s Good Vibes in The Bay Area! That’s why the Giants will make the playoffs, as I predicted.
Nobody saw the Pirates coming. I was like “they’re going to make the playoffs!” They’re going to make the playoffs, as I predicted.
Are the Orioles, Royals, Padres or Texas Rangers going to make the playoffs? I picked them all to make the playoffs. They all will. Here’s why.
Jeff Bannister looks like Jeremy Renner. Wow. That counts for a lot.
Eric Hosmer is Handsome. And AJ Ellis is good karma. So is Andy Green.
Jorge Soler has “the look.” That’s why I picked him to be the AL MVP this year when everybody else had no idea who he was. Now they do.
The Intelligentsia tried to destroy Buck Showalter after the AL Wild Card game in 2016. He’s still standing.
This season is just getting started.
SABR Skeptic 